In the preface of the COLW Book of Life, Fr. Matthew Blake OCD mentions how the text seeks, of necessity, to 'put in words' an expression of the desires, experiences and collective understanding of the Community - namely in this instance the sisters - as they have responded to the movement and action of the Holy Spirit in their lives and through the development of COLW. Through this process God has given the COLW charism as a gift to the Church.
Sometimes its easy to tell another person in words what God has done for us. When Mary sang out her Magnificat we glimpse an image of her uplifted head as the words flowed from her grateful, rejoicing heart. At other times we struggle to find the right words to express our responses, feelings and reactions in prayer. Surely it wasnt always easy for the author of the Psalms to express some of the more difficult moments of their life.
Reading through the Book of Life, elloquently written and beautifully describing the various aspects of this precious charism, it's hard to grasp quite how hard it may sometimes have been to capture the essence of what has been happening over this past decade and a half in the hearts and lives of those living it.
For us then, as we read the Book of Life to learn about the charism and to seek to know our path with the ecclesial family of COLW, it can also be hard to put into words the action of God in our lives or the movements of our hearts in response.
This is where the creative response comes into play - as a fruit of our meditation and rumination - of the parts of the text that speak to us, whether positively or less so.
In the Preface, Fr. Matt continues with a quote from the Spiritual Canticle of St. John of the Cross,
" It is better to explain the utterances of love (of the Spirit) in their broadest sense so that each one may derive profit from them according to the mode and capacity of one's own spirit, rather than narrow them down to a meaning unadaptable to every palate"
Which is to say that this book has been written with a view to describe the history and development of the Community and to explain the details and extent of the charism - but it is written so as to be applicable to everyone.
We can read its pages and apply them to our own life too, asking ourselves How is Jesus speaking to me in this mystery? Where is God leading me in his Divine Will? What does living in the Divine WiIl mean for my life? Can I be more like Mary? How is my life Incarnational? Each aspect of the charism can be turned inward as a question or as an observation of our hearts as we seek to travel within on this pilgriamge to the Holy House of our own soul.
A reading of the Book of Life alongside a prayerful reading of the daily Gospel will very much help to answer these questions and similar other thoughts, suggestions and proposals that Jesus might surprise you with over the coming months.
A wise person has said, 'whatever you find hard to do, do it with all your might'. This charism of COLW is a contemplative one, rooted in the spirituality of the Carmelite tradition. As such, time for reflections and mediation upon the mysteries of God, most especially the mystery of the Incarnation, is essential to this journey. It may take discipline and effort to turn up and read, to listen and most of all to find a response to the daily invitation, but it will be worth it!
We will also need to be obedient to the counsel of the Desert Fathers, to 'Know Thyself'. As attractive as might be the idea of following a life dedicated to reflection on the mysteries of God, another large part of the process is by means of learning to know ourselves in all our woundedness and poverty, in our nothingness from which God calls us to be His children. This affective maturity also requires work and dedicated time for prayer and reflection. Preferably also, we would suggest working through this journey with the support of a good Spiritual Director, who can help you to go deeper into the hidden things of your heart and what Jesus is saying to you intimately, through this period of your life.
Let's pray for one another as we set out together on this journey, seeking only to live in the Divine Will. Through close reading of the Book of Life with a listening heart, meditating on the Gospels in the light of the COLW charism, with open hearts willing to be changed and transformed, let's dare to put into words all the Jesus is saying to our hearts.
Our Lady will pray for us too as together we hope to be able to sing our own Magnificat of praise and thanksgiving. We hope also to say our own Fiat too, in joy and in sorrow, every moment.